I’ve always encouraged my kids to ask why. Most parents get frustrated at that oft-repeated question, myself included. However, being able to question and interrogate a situation or circumstance is a skill of vital importance. That’s because, in seeking answers, we gain understanding, wisdom, and perhaps a feeling of personal connection.
It’s one of the reasons I’m an avid historian. I like to examine how we got to where we are and why things are the way they are. The way I figure it, if I help educate while informing others in the process, I’ve done what God put me on earth to do. In a sense, I believe I’m fulfilling my purpose.
And this is where I find tension with my Christian walk.
Though we are given Scripture, are guided by the Holy Spirit, and can go to God in prayer, answers don’t always come easily. Nor do they arrive on the timeline I want. Rather, God reveals or provides wisdom and discernment on his timetable when we’re ready to receive it.
Still, I have to ask why.
In fact, should I be so blessed to enter into Heaven and get to ask just one question of God, my question will be simple; I will ask why.
For now, though, I continue seeking answers to questions in the ways I am able while on earth. This is especially true – albeit frustrating – when I am irritable and angry for what seems to be no reason.
Jonathan Edwards Resolution 60
Edwards’ Resolution #60 (as it was written)
Resolved, whenever my feelings begin to appear in the least out of order, when I am conscious of the least uneasiness within, or the least irregularity without, I will then subject myself to the strictest examination. July 4 and 13, 1723.Edwards’ Resolution #60 (in my modernized language)
When feeling out of sorts, or aware of uneasiness in my heart, I’ll pray and examine to find out why that is.
In studying resolution 60, I consulted Edwards’ journal on the dates noted in the resolution. I also took a look at some related entries around the same time. It was trying to get a more in-depth portrait of what was going on in Edwards’ mind. I find him strongly influenced by sermons he’d taken in. Also, I see him pondering how to address fear of dying, judgement of others, handling personal disputes, and the appropriateness of connecting with other believers in worship of God.
How Not to Fear Death
On July 4, Edwards’s penned some thoughts on death in his journal. He points out that the person who is fully trusting in God and faithful in their walk should not fear the prospect of death. He says,
“when thinking of death, I thought if I was then to die, that which would make me die in the least degree fearfully, would be the want of a trusting and relying on Jesus Christ, so distinctly and plainly, as has been described by divines…”
When our time comes, that we are called home, it should not be accompanied with fear. This is true, so long as we have been faithful in our walk with the Lord to that point.
If we don’t ask why, we never gain answers to life’s most vital questions. Edwards resolved to ask why, and (among other things) learned to face death without fear.
When Handling Disputes
Near the end of his July 4 journal entry, Edwards also addresses how we should behave when in disputes with others. He notes:
“for the future to observe rather more of meekness, moderation, and temper in disputes.”
When I read this, I gain a semblance of humility. An attitude that seeks to understand from the position of an advocate and friend rather than that of a superior. When he says “temper” in this case, I have to believe he means that of “tempered” or “conditioned.” As such, we must interact with a heart of wisdom, for the only other tempering is of hubris, ignorance and selfishness.
In his July 13th entry, Edwards elaborates on his thoughts about judging the hearts of people. He also puts the aforementioned thoughts on tempering into this 60th resolution. He adds in:
“In times past, I have been too free in judging of the hearts of men from their actions.”
I suspect we all fall into this camp. I know I do.
Worshiping Alone and with Other Believers
Some Sundays, I enter into the church building all the while not wanting any part of being social – or even friendly. It’s part of my introversion, I guess. This is particularly the case when I am ailing or have had a brutally tough week. My mind is overwhelmed and trying to wind down. Subconsciously, I probably am not wanting to exhaust my limited capacity by “performing” for those around me.
I think Edwards found himself in a similar place (I find that many pastors and those of academic minds fall into this type of pattern).
Finally, in his July 24 journal entry, he shares perspective on worshiping, which is quite counter to this type of attitude.
“I begin to find the success of my striving, in joining with others, in the worship of God; insomuch that there is a prospect of making it easy and delightful, and very profitable, in time.”
Also around this time, Edwards grows determined to be genuine and fully open in his connection with God. Much of this is no doubt the result of Manton’s sermon on Psalm 119 (will see that in the study of the next resolution).
A Genuine Inquiry
In looking at the above, we find a humble attempt to dissect one’s behaviors. We find that a perfectly human fear of death is absent in the heart of the most faithful. We also see that judgement over the heart’s of others is a fruitless exercise. And finally, we are presented with the value of worship in concert with others.
Edwards dared to ask why when it came to some of the greatest questions of all mankind: death, motives, and relationships. All of them tie back to our mode of everyday worship of God.