God’s rejection is real. That’s a very tough reality. And it’s a fear that – at least secretly – haunts every Christian at some point. Perhaps even non-Christians give this some serious thought.
There are two things I have observed about Jonathan Edwards while studying his resolutions and events of his life. First, Edwards had a reverent fear of God. Probably more than 99% that today’s earth-dwelling Christians. That fact exists in so many of his resolutions, in his journal, and in much of his writing. Resolution 51 is certainly evidence of it as well.
The second thing I have observed about Edwards is that he might have had a miserly, or curmudgeonly, disposition about him. In fact, he suffered from severe depression. And it was Edwards’s depression that also provided a spiritual conversion, finding solace in God’s saving grace.
In his writing, and seeking to empathize with Edwards, I see that he was sometimes – maybe often – agitated and irritable. Moreover, Edwards was grieved by this irritability. Such is the life of an intellectual introvert, which might also explain his dissatisfaction with flamboyant preaching, the likes of George Whitefield.
In Edwards, we see a man desperately wanting to live a more holy lifestyle. One that is pleasing to God and of a perpetually joyous spirit. In Edwards, I see myself. Not the brilliant theologian master, but a depressed introvert constantly at odds with himself and in reverent fear of God.
One that fear’s God’s rejection.
Jonathan Edwards Resolution 51
Edwards’ Resolution #51 (as it was written)
Resolved, that I will act so, in every respect, as I think I shall wish I had done, if I should at last be damned. July 8, 1723.
Edwards’ Resolution #51 (in my modernized language)
My internal and outward dialogue will reflect the way I will wish it had if rejected by God.
Rejected by God? It’s visible in the book of Hosea, so should we fear it as well? Yes, but we must approach with the right attitude of fear.
Troubled by my own Irritability
There is no journal entry from Edwards for July 8th. The entry nearest to it is on July 5th. That happens to be the day in which he composed Resolution 50. On that day, he wrote:
Last night, when thinking what I should wish I had done, that I had not done, if I was then to die; I thought I should wish, that I had been more importunate with God to fit me for death, and lead me into all truth, and that I might not be deceived about the state of my soul.
In reading this and other entries around this time, I get the impression that Edwards is troubled by his personal irritable nature. Boy, I can really relate to this. It is not a secret to those who know me that I can be very irritable. What few people know, though, is that I am just as often troubled by this attribute of my nature.
I am full knowing that my irritability negatively impacts my behavior, my relationships, and my effectiveness. Even worse, my irritable nature also squelches the light of God as it is seen by others.
I think about this, and I am grief finds my heart.
Sin is Action Rebellion Against God
My people are being destroyed because they don’t know me. Since you priests refuse to know me, I refuse to recognize you as my priests. Since you have forgotten the laws of your God, I will forget to bless your children. – Hosea 4:6 NLT
Ignorance is one thing. Active rebellion despite having knowledge is another. It’s active sin and rebellion. In this case, Hosea is speaking to Israel, prophesying. He tells them that, because they had forgotten God’s Law, God would forget them and their children. They would experience God’s rectionion. . In other words, he took future blessings to the nation off the table.
They ignored Hosea’s warnings. Assyria conquered Israel. God’s blessings were lost to many. Yet, God then spares a remnant, restoring His relationship.
What does this mean for us as we consider the possibility of God’s rejection?
To answer it, let’s look at the book of Hebrews:
This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. – Hebrews 4:15-16 NLT
These verses remind us that, in Christ, we have a savior and redeemer. A solution to an otherwise justified rejection. This should make us confident to draw close to God, to walk with him, without worry or anxiety over his rejecting us.
Humble yourselves, repent, and remember this awesome work that has been done for us.